everything feels so strange without you these days. i think it finally started kicking in, this unfamiliarity of anyone who isn't you. i remember i used to think, i never liked my name before i heard you say it. there's something completely different about me when you say my name, i know my name is safe in your mouth. i don't think anybody can ever recreate that. i am now so easily distracted, so easily distant, for everything around me is strangeness.