fuck, I’m now stuck back flat

against the bed but nowhere to go 

the only way out is tears and so, so, so

so I close my eyes and run to

a different strand of time when we

existed

through multiples on stairways of fibre cables running straight

and sideways

sliding horizontally into the past 

on to an msn window where you lean backwards on a couch feet up face away

typing to me at midnight, 

maybe later I’m not quite sure anymore 

a glossy window sits neatly on a matte grey laptop 

lying on a marble floor, hiding

illuminated by the screen and only your words, only your words, only yours 

my name kept safe only

yours and us and yours and mine and us

batting words back and forth only us cracking jokes at 15 and 18 there was no one but us only

us

Malta 13 September 2019 01:05

hôm nay soạn lại email, em giật mình không ngờ tim mình từng đủ chỗ để yêu nhiều
đến thế

"lúc nào em cũng muốn anh ở đây
em ở đâu em cũng muốn anh ở đây."

11.7.2010

It’s nice to know I was once capable of such emotions. 

To no longer be friends, or anything at all. 

I hope that makes you happy. 

I hope you got what you wanted. 

I hope being strangers is going well for you too. 

i hoped you're happy, and i guess you are.

chắc là em chẳng yêu anh nữa,
nhưng dù sao thì em vẫn mong anh vui.

i'm so thankful you're nothing like the person i still dream about.
the person i still fully emerge myself in, despite who's around.
but out of these dreams, you might as well be anyone else.